Oct 24, 2017
Brian Mayer discusses the different parenting styles. This
is such a hot button issue for couples and is made more complicated
in a blended family. As a result of touchy new connections
made between stepparents and stepchildren, this issue can unravel
the best of families if there is not considerable care.
Parental styles can also be engrained from childhood and past
relationships making it more difficult to change. We hope you
enjoy today’s message. For more information and additional
resources please visit our website at http://www.theremarriedlife.com
- In thinking about parenting styles, Brian reminds us to think
about what style was exhibited by your parents and if there were
differences if you grew up the child of divorce. Also
thinking about the styles that were present in previous
relationship and how you prefer to parent presently. Finally
and just as important understand all of these same issues and
styles of your partner’s past and present.
- Parenting styles were develop through research by Diana
Baumrind in the 1960’s. She looked at the Responsiveness of
the parent which includes setting Expectations and
Discipline. She also looked at Support that a parent provides
which includes things how easy or difficult is the child able to
comfortably communicate issues with the parent.
- The second parenting style is
Neglectful. This parent is Low
Responsiveness (Discipline) and Low Support. This style often
occurs when a parent travels extensively, when there is drug abuse
by a parent, or a parent that has simply abandoned the home.
It can also occur by parents that are completely absorbed into
other aspects of life.
- The third parenting style is
Authoritarian. This parent is High
Responsiveness (Discipline) and Low Support. Sometimes called
the Drill Seargent or the “It’s My Way or the Highway”
parent. There is high regard for discipline and structure but
little warmth and much emotional distance.
- The fourth parenting style is Authoritative
and is considered the healthiest. This parent is High
Responsiveness (Discipline) and High Support. There are lots
of boundaries, but also lots of reciprocal discussion about the
issues. The parent is Assertive but flexible. This sets
up the child for success later in life.
- Do both parents have to be the same style? The research
says it is best if both are Authoritative, but as long as one is
Authoritative especially in a new blended family where the
stepparent may alienate a child by becoming Authoritative too soon,
then it is acceptable if there is a difference.
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